After 84 YEARS OF MARRIAGE, Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher are still going strong...http://www.newbernsj.com/news/herbert_42128___article.html/zelmyra_children.html
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If you're interested in reading stories from married couples on how they knew their mate was "the one", this would be the place to read, cry, laugh, contemplate and comment.
A Letter to My (Single) Daughter (from God)
My Daughter,
You are right where you are supposed to be. So many people have theories and insights on how couples are to come together and the truth is that many miss it by interpreting what they want rather than what I choose. A man pursuing...a girl refusing, these are not necessarily the optimal conditions for mate selection. Adam did not “pursue” the Woman, nor did she spend her time creating ways to make it challenging for him to do so. Just like one’s purpose or date of birth and death, it is I who determines the “who, when, and where” of authentic and spirit-led matrimony and intimacy. It is the responsibility of both parties to follow as I, and I only lead.
You are not waiting on some man to “get his act together” or “see you for who you really are”, and no matter how it may appear to you in the physical realm, in the spiritual sense, “he” is right on schedule; my schedule. You are not to be listening to what man says, no matter what form the voice may reveal itself (media, tradition, statistics, naysayers, etc.). Remember, I decided when it was time for Adam to receive the miracle of female assistance and so if you have an issue with physical time, don’t take that up with anyone other than me; even then, know that I have your best interest at heart. Far too many of my daughters are consuming themselves with fear and anxiety about things that are really none of their concern. My ways are not your ways and until I unite you with the one you are purposed to benefit, his whereabouts and activities are not to be a priority to you. If you have not been joined to him yet, it’s simply because it’s not the right moment. He is not ready and neither are you. There are finishing touches that must be placed on you both and no matter how you may feel or what you might think, I am a God of order. I will not be pressured to move outside of my plan.
I know it must be hard. Flesh never likes to submit to my will. But please let me continue to mold you. Before you ever existed, you were hand-selected for someone and that has not changed. As the Creator, I am excited about my handiwork. Don’t go looking for answers to questions you are not able to conceptualize or present in a way that will intimidate me to react or respond. As I did with your parents, let me have the pleasure of presenting you as a gift to your mate. Ask your mother and father if they will ever forget the first time they saw your face. I want “him” to experience a similar thrill. If you want to channel out your energies, get excited about how excited I am about you; about how blessed I know he will be to have you!
Again, don’t concern yourself about the time. I am timeless. Concern yourself instead with remaining in my hands so that I can perfect you to be all that he needs--- so that when it’s the right moment, there will be no fear, no hesitation, no question that you are indeed the one that he is meant to live out the rest of his days on the earth with. Far too many women are not praised on their wedding day by their husbands in the way I would’ve liked because they did not allow me the opportunity to complete them to be what was required, and the man was not discerning enough to know the true purpose that his companion was meant to serve in his life.
I want more for you. Love me enough to let me give it to you. Just as you are to be a blessing to him, he is to be provider and protector for you; he is to bless you as well in ways even your prayers have yet to articulate, but in my infinite wisdom, I know you deserve.
Remember, above all else that, like faith, marriage is a spiritual union. This is the time to remove yourself from your senses, from what the physical is telling you and tap into your spirit. This is when you can please me most by standing and believing that I am true to my Word...even when you don’t see, feel or hear evidence of its manifestation. The Spirit always moves at what you all call “light years” ahead of the flesh. It takes it some time to catch up. (Hebrews 11:6) Be patient. (I Corinthians 13:4)
Stay in my will and I will show you the way---a way that leads to love, bliss and happiness. A place where you will feel naked and not ashamed…until death parts you. A place where your future husband will restfully await you.
I love you. Be still and know. Really know. I do.
Your Heavenly Father
©Shellie R. Warren/2008
You are right where you are supposed to be. So many people have theories and insights on how couples are to come together and the truth is that many miss it by interpreting what they want rather than what I choose. A man pursuing...a girl refusing, these are not necessarily the optimal conditions for mate selection. Adam did not “pursue” the Woman, nor did she spend her time creating ways to make it challenging for him to do so. Just like one’s purpose or date of birth and death, it is I who determines the “who, when, and where” of authentic and spirit-led matrimony and intimacy. It is the responsibility of both parties to follow as I, and I only lead.
You are not waiting on some man to “get his act together” or “see you for who you really are”, and no matter how it may appear to you in the physical realm, in the spiritual sense, “he” is right on schedule; my schedule. You are not to be listening to what man says, no matter what form the voice may reveal itself (media, tradition, statistics, naysayers, etc.). Remember, I decided when it was time for Adam to receive the miracle of female assistance and so if you have an issue with physical time, don’t take that up with anyone other than me; even then, know that I have your best interest at heart. Far too many of my daughters are consuming themselves with fear and anxiety about things that are really none of their concern. My ways are not your ways and until I unite you with the one you are purposed to benefit, his whereabouts and activities are not to be a priority to you. If you have not been joined to him yet, it’s simply because it’s not the right moment. He is not ready and neither are you. There are finishing touches that must be placed on you both and no matter how you may feel or what you might think, I am a God of order. I will not be pressured to move outside of my plan.
I know it must be hard. Flesh never likes to submit to my will. But please let me continue to mold you. Before you ever existed, you were hand-selected for someone and that has not changed. As the Creator, I am excited about my handiwork. Don’t go looking for answers to questions you are not able to conceptualize or present in a way that will intimidate me to react or respond. As I did with your parents, let me have the pleasure of presenting you as a gift to your mate. Ask your mother and father if they will ever forget the first time they saw your face. I want “him” to experience a similar thrill. If you want to channel out your energies, get excited about how excited I am about you; about how blessed I know he will be to have you!
Again, don’t concern yourself about the time. I am timeless. Concern yourself instead with remaining in my hands so that I can perfect you to be all that he needs--- so that when it’s the right moment, there will be no fear, no hesitation, no question that you are indeed the one that he is meant to live out the rest of his days on the earth with. Far too many women are not praised on their wedding day by their husbands in the way I would’ve liked because they did not allow me the opportunity to complete them to be what was required, and the man was not discerning enough to know the true purpose that his companion was meant to serve in his life.
I want more for you. Love me enough to let me give it to you. Just as you are to be a blessing to him, he is to be provider and protector for you; he is to bless you as well in ways even your prayers have yet to articulate, but in my infinite wisdom, I know you deserve.
Remember, above all else that, like faith, marriage is a spiritual union. This is the time to remove yourself from your senses, from what the physical is telling you and tap into your spirit. This is when you can please me most by standing and believing that I am true to my Word...even when you don’t see, feel or hear evidence of its manifestation. The Spirit always moves at what you all call “light years” ahead of the flesh. It takes it some time to catch up. (Hebrews 11:6) Be patient. (I Corinthians 13:4)
Stay in my will and I will show you the way---a way that leads to love, bliss and happiness. A place where you will feel naked and not ashamed…until death parts you. A place where your future husband will restfully await you.
I love you. Be still and know. Really know. I do.
Your Heavenly Father
©Shellie R. Warren/2008
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Where do you see the best examples of marriage?
Most people say they married for love. What is the next most important thing to you?
If you do desire to get married, what is your (top) motive?
Welcome to Free Online Premarital Counseling...Sorta
For a couple of years now, I have found myself asking random married couples, "So, how did you know that was your mate?"
At first, I think it was because I was getting to the point where I had NO CLUE how to know (my dating batting average was pretty crappy), but as I have begun to FINALLY settle into the gift of my singleness, I realize that it's more because, just like no fingerprint is identical, neither is any married couple. However, if you listen...and I mean *really listen* to what they have to say, you can learn something---life-saving. As married people, you can learn from other couples what to do...and well, what not to do. But for singles, I think it helps to get advice/wisdom/insight from people who actually know what they're talking about. I mean, why keep asking your girlfriend for advice on marriage when she's just as single (and oftentimes clueless) as you are? Feel me?
That is why I was led to create this blog. It's a place where, in between my other 80 million PAYING GIGS, I will post information and testimonies that I think will provide an ounce of prevention and food for thought for those of us who desire to be married...happily...one time...forever...SOMEDAY.
I will be trying to get up new "So, How Did YOU Know" stories up on a bi-weekly basis (they really are pretty fascinating), but please feel free to stop by and leave and comment or two. If there is a question you have, I will try and provide you with an answer either via the Word, one of the married folks featured, a book reference...movie line...SOMETHING!
It's time that we raise that marriage/divorce ratio back into the married side's favor. Marriage (and all of it's benefits) is a gift---an awesome, amazing, beautiful, inspirational, precious gift---and it should be treated as such.
Oh, and be sure to pass this on to your single, clueless girlfriend, too. We want her to be happy just like the rest of us.
Happy Reading,
SRW
At first, I think it was because I was getting to the point where I had NO CLUE how to know (my dating batting average was pretty crappy), but as I have begun to FINALLY settle into the gift of my singleness, I realize that it's more because, just like no fingerprint is identical, neither is any married couple. However, if you listen...and I mean *really listen* to what they have to say, you can learn something---life-saving. As married people, you can learn from other couples what to do...and well, what not to do. But for singles, I think it helps to get advice/wisdom/insight from people who actually know what they're talking about. I mean, why keep asking your girlfriend for advice on marriage when she's just as single (and oftentimes clueless) as you are? Feel me?
That is why I was led to create this blog. It's a place where, in between my other 80 million PAYING GIGS, I will post information and testimonies that I think will provide an ounce of prevention and food for thought for those of us who desire to be married...happily...one time...forever...SOMEDAY.
I will be trying to get up new "So, How Did YOU Know" stories up on a bi-weekly basis (they really are pretty fascinating), but please feel free to stop by and leave and comment or two. If there is a question you have, I will try and provide you with an answer either via the Word, one of the married folks featured, a book reference...movie line...SOMETHING!
It's time that we raise that marriage/divorce ratio back into the married side's favor. Marriage (and all of it's benefits) is a gift---an awesome, amazing, beautiful, inspirational, precious gift---and it should be treated as such.
Oh, and be sure to pass this on to your single, clueless girlfriend, too. We want her to be happy just like the rest of us.
Happy Reading,
SRW
What do you fear losing by getting married?
Relationship Preparation Book Recommendations
- "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man" by Steve Harvey
- "Boundaries" by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
- "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie
- "Emotional Blackmail" by Susan Forward and Donna Fraizer
- "False Roads to Manhood" by Frank Chase, Jr.
- "For Men Only" by Shaunti Feldhahn
- "Girl, Get Your Credit Straight!" by Glinda Bridgforth
- "God, Marriage and Family" by Andrea Kostenberger
- "He's Just Not That Into You" by Greg Behrendt
- "His Needs, Her Needs" by William F. Harley, Jr.
- "How to Live Life on Purpose" by Myles Monroe
- "Intended for Pleasure" by Dr. Ed Wheat and Gaye Wheat
- "It's Not About Me" by Max Lucado
- "Revolutionary Road" by Richard Yates
- "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" by Robert T. Kiyosaki
- "Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts" by Les and Leslie Parrott
- "Single Married, Separated & Life After Divorce" by Myles Munroe
- "The Emotionally Abused Woman" by Beverly Engel
- "The Magic of Forgiveness" by Ph.D., Tian Dayton
- "You: Being Beautiful" by Michael F. Roizen
More Relationship Preparation Book Recommendations
- "Inside of Me" by Shellie R. Warren
- "Love & Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
- "One Night With the King" by Tommy Tenney
- "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers
- "Sacred Sex" by Tim Alan Gardner
- "Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by John M. Gottman
- "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman
- "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Puiz
- "The Power of a Praying Husband" by Stormie Omartian
- "The Power of a Praying Wife" by Stormie Omartian
- "The Red Tent" by Anita Diamant
- "The Value in the Valley" by Iyanla Vanzant
- "What You Didn't Learn from Your Parents About Sex" by Matthew Paul Turner
What do you think lacks in most marriages today?
What scares you most about marriage?
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About Me
- SRW
- Nashville, TN
This is not about this post, but I had to post it somewhere.
ReplyDeleteThat "letter to my daughter" on the side is truly awesome, even for a guy. It is good to know that the waiting is not just a waste of time. It is also a motivation to try to become a good husband before I even know who's husband I will be.
84 years is a long time. God has truly blessd this couple. I pray that guy and I are blessed to stay together this long.
ReplyDelete