Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Lee Speaks On How He Knew

Wedding Anniversary Date: October 6, 2001

How he knew his wife was the one for him:

The first time I met Kimberly was at the skating center in Rivergate at a youth function. I had worked with the youth at our church for several years and I was transitioning out of that department and into working with the single’s ministry at our church. She had just moved here with her job from Atlanta and she had recently joined our church and was beginning to transition into working with the youth department. One of my lifelong friends, Arnetta Woodard, introduced me to Kimberly and asked if I could take her around the rink a couple of times. I said 'sure.' I did not think anything of it...actually, I thought she seemed nice and she looked so young that I thought she may have been a youth. After a couple of times around, she was very gracious and said, 'I am not that good at skating and you seem to really enjoy it, so you can just take me to the side on the next round.' I said, 'Okay' and that was it.

Fast forward about a year and I met her again, as I found out that we had lots of mutual friends in common. So, we became friends. She actually dated one of my old friends at that point, but they didn't continue dating when he moved to another city. So, time passed and we continued to be friends. Then one year I needed a date for our Pastor’s Anniversary Banquet. I had seen her dance, act and work with the youth at our church. I became increasingly drawn to her. So, I asked her if she would like to go to the banquet with me and she said she would let me know. See, I was proactive and asked her about two-and-a-half months before the event. So, a month went by and still no answer. I followed up with her and asked if she had made a decision and she said that she would go with me. Two weeks later, I said, 'Well, I do not want the first time we hang out to be at the banquet since there would be other people at the table and I did not want to be rude and ignore all of them, so maybe we should hang out before the banquet.' She said, 'Okay.' So, I took her to see Madame Butterfly, her first opera and mine. We went to dinner afterwards. I think we actually made it to the movies before the banquet as well. See, even white men have game. (smile)

It seemed like the more I hung out with her, the more time I wanted to spend with her. It got to the point where I wanted to give my heart to her and I could not. So, I broke things off with her and tried to come to terms with this blockage. It was a word from the Lord that I had received about a particular young lady being my wife and we had dated before for about five years. I knew that He had told me that she was the one. The only problem was she had since all that time, married someone else, divorced him and remarried. And all I was left with was what God had told me. So, I tried my best to process through that. I am too analytical some times for my own good.

I kept missing Kimberly though, and so I decided to call her again. I did. We talked on the phone from time-to-time. Months passed and we began hanging out again and I was growing to love Kimberly even more. Yet, I was still struggling with this word. So, it got to the point of where I had to make a decision because I did not want to keep stringing this woman along and it was not fair for her to be with a man who could not give her all of himself. So, we cried and prayed that night and God spoke to my spirit and told me NOT to make a decision to end the relationship until I spoke with three people. My response was, 'Well, if I can hear you tell me to talk with three people, then why can’t you just tell me what they are going to say?' He did not reply and His silence spoke volumes to me.

So, I shared that with Kimberly and we remained prayerful. I made the appointments to speak with the three people and each one of them gave me a piece of the puzzle to help me process through where I was. The one story that I will share with you that one of the individuals shared with me that brought me so much peace was that God changed His mind about a decision He had made to make Saul the King of Israel. So, God refused Saul as king (because of his disobedience) and chose David to be king, instead. For some reason, I had never seen it as God changing His mind, but He did. And so, what was revealed to me was that He (God) was taking me (the kingdom of Israel) from Saul (the lady he had spoken a word to me about marrying) and giving me to David (Kimberly) because she knew how to take care of the kingdom that was inside of me.

Well, that was all I needed to hear. But to further confirm His word, He also gave me a dream where I was on this operating table and I was cognizant of the fact that Kimberly was the surgeon. She cut me open and then left. Feeling abandoned I got up and put my insides back in and held them and went to look for her. As I started out the door, she came in and hurried me back to the operating table and I said, 'I thought you left me.' She said, 'No, I just need to get some tools that I needed to finish.' So, I woke up and immediately the Lord gave me an understanding of my dream. He said that I did not have to fear her finding out what was on the inside of me, because He needed to reveal that to her and I could trust her. He said that in order for her to get to where He needed for her to be, she needed what was on the inside of me and in order for me to get where He needed for me to be, I needed what was on the inside of her.

From that moment, I have never looked back. There is so much more, but I will stop here. We have been married now for nearly eight years and we have a three-year-old daughter, Princess Rose McGahey (that is another testimony unto itself).


What he loves about her mind: I like the way she processes details and makes sense of the world from her perspective. My wife was the council president and graduated valedictorian of her class in high school. She is extremely unassuming and brilliant. Although she has so much to brag about in terms of her intellect and accomplishments, that is not her way. That is one of the reasons why God put me in her life- to brag on the awesome woman that she is and all that she brings to the table.

What he loves about her body: Aside from the fact that she was the homecoming queen in college and after you get passed the fact that she is “5'5” with brown eyes and smile like the sunrise”, have you ever heard the song, “Brick House” by the Commodores (or I may be dating myself and telling my age here)? Enough said.

What he loves about her spirit: Try as you might, you will never find a woman more gentle, forgiving, nurturing, strong and the personification of First Corinthians 13:1-8.


Lee's advice to single men about marriage:

“Know who God is. Know who God says you are. Know what your passion and purpose are in life. Know how she is supposed to complement you and vice versa. Find the one who will treat you like a king, even when or if you have to live with her in the public housing projects (humility)-and once you find her, work hard to love her, protect her and provide for her the best palace you can- she deserves it...After all, she will be your queen!

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